Here.. for the wrong reasons.

[Malachi Luna]

I usually did not go to churches. Ever, as I was kind of scared of the thought of religion in general. I was gay, and it was against many religions to be gay, correct? So I kind of just assumed that because I was gay that I was going to go to hell. I don't know why it freaked me out, I didn't believe in God or anything like that. I wasn't a religious person because of all of the fear that was built up inside of me.. The pressure to come out and the fear of coming out would scare me half to death when I found out I was gay.

Everyone around here was homophobic, they'd probably try and burn me at the stake before trying to get to know me. If I could help who I was.. I would do anything. Anything to give myself a second chance at life-- to move out of this crazy shit hole to a new place. A place that would give me happiness and solace, one that would be a bit more accepting of my ways. But I couldn't choose the problems that I had, deep down inside, even if I wish that I could. But, that's why I was here.

Hoping that maybe.. praying to this God would give me another chance at life. One that could purify my soul of the homosexuality inside of me. I hated to admit it, but even I was homophobic. Oh, the irony, a closet homosexual with homophobia. But, maybe it was just the fear that I had.. I did everything to try and get myself to be straight. But on the inside, I was depressed; my emotions burning themselves in a big bonfire. I just.. didn't know if I could take much more of the shit.. I didn't know how I was going to deal with this much longer.

So many people hurting homosexuals, and me just watching them get hurt. If I did anything, people might start to think that I was homosexual as well.. And I didn't want them to think that I was. A small sigh extruded out of my mouth and I took my leave from the outside to the inside of the large church, looking around at the many seats.. Not many were inside, a couple of people praying on the seats. Plus the minister, but it really wasn't church time..

So I simply walked over to one of the seats, not really knowing anything about Catholic traditions, and simply began to, what I thought was praying. To get rid of my 'sinful ways', in the Christian eye.

[General Disaster]

The church was, for the most part, empty. Mass had ended a few minutes ago, but Dostya had still not finished her prayers infront of the sheet-covered altar, silent in both mute reverence and plain muteness. She was smiling slightly, rosary around her neck, wearing the greatcoat over a shirt and what Danya termed 'buisness pants'. After about fifteen minutes of mental 'lord bless so-and-so', she stood, made the cross upon her body with her fingers, and turned her back on the effigy of Jesus (which, by rights,should not have been there anyway) and began walking down the marble path outside.

It was when she was approximately halfway down the pews when she saw a new member of the flock. Quickly writing something down, in an effort not to forget it, she handed said note to the newcomer.

I haven't seen you here before, but you look familiar. Either He works in ways more mysterious than my comprehension, or you go to Highview County.

[/blockquote]

[Malachi Luna]

I blinked, not realizing that a girl was trying to hand me a note. I simply smiled whilst praying, and finally after a little while, I noticed the note that she had handed me. Er, could she talk? I'd wondered, looking at her for a moment before reading the note. "No, I go to Highview, it's nice to meet you..?" I said, looking at her with a frail smile. I kind of looked like I'd just seen a ghost, but that was only because I was kind of odded out by what she meant by 'He'.

I didn't know the term He was also the term for their God, so I had no idea what the hell she truly meant about that. "Actually, I think that I do know you. Well, I've seen you," I said, getting up from the seat, "I'm Malachi," I said, nodding. It was always nice to meet a fresh new face, "Don't.. get the wrong idea, I'm not here to stay. I'm just here for some personal issues." I said, looking at her. I wasn't going to bring it any closer than that when it came to those personal problems of mine.

"But, maybe he does indeed work in mysterious ways?"

[General]

Dostya smiled like some sort of doting grandmother, listening to his soft voice from his rather nice smile. If he was a girl, she'd definetly be interested. Internalising what he said, she wrote a reply, concious of how tall she must have been above him.

Well, you've come to the right place. Father Damascus just went out, but the Lord is always listening. Then again, if you prefer a more visible reply, I'd be happy to help. I'm Dostya, our flock's official lesbian.

[/i]

(WORST REPLY EVER.)

[Malachi Luna]

I read the next note and just kindly smiled at her. So she was a lesbian? I thought it was against the Catholic church to be gay or be a lesbian, "I thought it was against.. you know, you be g-lesbian?" I said, cutting myself off for a moment to change the word I was about to say. I was so confused right now, maybe I just did not expect the fact that maybe some Catholics accepted lesbians for who they are? I don't know how she even go by living in Highview by being a lesbian. It was hard enough to be a closet like me, but to be out of the closet in Highview. It seemed brave and dangerous.

"Well, it's nice to meet you, Dostya, mind if I call you Dusty?" I said with a smile on my face right now, I was kind of glad to be meeting someone who also aimed for the home base.. But I still didn't tell her, I was glad that she had no idea just yet. God, she was sooo much taller than me, I'd kind of wondered how she got so tall. Of course, in my family tree, everyone was short.

We didn't have many tall people in our family at all, so the fact that it ran through out genes helped a bit.

[General Disaster]

Dostya sniggered silently, writing as quickly as she could. He'd given away either niavete or homosexuality, not to mention the wrong religion. Smiling warmly, she sat down next to him in the pew, handing the note over with a soft motion. He was giving off nice vibes amidst the candles of the small(ish) church.

Well, for one I'm Orthodox, and although he's a nice man and all that, if the Pope is going to tell me what I can and can't prod and poke, he can stick his hat where the...well, you know. Besides, Jesus taught tolerance. I don't think a single quote in Corinthians-written by Jews-is the defintive proof that I will go to hell. No, I think I'm safe. You can ask Father Damascus if you like. He's filling in from the local Orthodox church because Father Joe is ill, and I'm here because I'm one of the laywomen.

[Malachi Luna]

I felt so stupid for doing that now. I could not believe that I had thought something that was not true of the Catholic religion and now I had almost instantaneously facepalmed, looking at her. "Nope, it's fine.. I'll.. yeah. Just forget it," I said, smiling around the church. I did find solace in this place, an unearthy calm mostly because of everything in the church. The surroundings just made it seem like a sacred place, and I did feel welcome here.. But.. I wouldn't be staying for long.

Soon, I was going to be scurrying off to never come back to this place again. Well, I had hoped. It was not like I had even wanted to come here in the first place, but I think Dostya kind of got the idea of why I was even here; even if she did not know why I was praying. "Well, thanks for telling me," I'd said, looking at her for a moment before looking away. Technically, I guess you could say I had just practically told her I was gay. But.. I was kind of hoping she didn't catch on, even if it did seem so.

"And, yeah, I agree with you. I guess we can't just fight inner emotions right? If I had someone that was going to tell me what to do.. Eh, it would be bad. I just.. wouldn't want to be treated like that."